~some forest days~

the new year here in the new forest has been all about the weather~after the snow and ice that kept us village bound for a good ten days came heavy rain and floods...

the single street that makes up our village ends with a ford~what the villagers have always called the 'watersplash'~on this day it was impassable.

take a left after the watersplash is a road that leads past what is known as the 'common' and heads up to an area of the forest known as 'ten bends'. the common and road became one huge lake

codys best friend snoop~not enjoying his walk. he was in fact carried for most of his walk this day

we have had the odd clear day and on this day we were treated to the most amazing sunset

with everything that has been going on i did not think to post a picture of the beautiful 'one-off' green man necklace swampy had made for me to go with 'my lady moon'~made by a wonderful soul known as roses

i have my birthday coming up and i know there is another 'one-off' item being crafted for me...

~the turning wheel*further~

such a lot has happened in such a short space of time and it is only now in the last few days things have slipped into place within my mind and i am finding peace from the darkness that has been here and finally accepting everything that has happened~it is still hard and each day brings new tears but yes, i am finding peace.

everything that has happened seems,to me,to have happened at significant times.

the sudden loss of our beautiful Cody was at a point of darkness~the waning of the midwinter moon, but at the same time at the turning of the wheel where the darkness,still strong,slowly wanes and welcomes the light.

my path has shown its strength at this time and i feel joy that i saw the darkness and came through it feeling stronger~knowing i came through the darkness means i can face it again one day.

~further~

my word for 2010, which came about from a thread in a forum i belong to~when the thread started i had no thought for a word and it wasn't important to me, but suddenly this week the word came to me. some of you out there may well recognise this wonderful bus and this is where my inspiration came from for my word.

photo by joe mabel

to me 'further' is a reminder to always keep moving forwards and not become stuck in the present or the past

so i shall move further forward in my life and down my chosen path~always with cody tucked deep in my heart

~moving on~

~Cody~

Cody came to us on the 3rd Jan 2005, at about a year old; from a breeder keen to get rid of him-he already had two previous owners, both who had returned him.
From the look of him, covered in a thick layer of dried on mud and goodness knows what else, he had been kept in some kind of outside cage.
He didn’t even know his given name.
Of course we could never say no, so he was welcomed into our home.
Three baths later he was a lovely shiny black and white and it was time to find him a good name~he chose it himself really. Keith said 'Cody', a character in 'American Chopper' and out of the few names we had tried it was the only one he, Cody, responded to, so Cody he became.


~*We soon found out what a true character he was*~

He was, and remained to the end, a collector, a helper…anything within reach and of the right size was fair game…tea towels, socks, bits of paper, sandpaper, coal, small logs, plant pots, gardening tools…one day I found him looking a little sheepish and trying to sneak indoors, when I got closer I found that the chirping noise I had been hearing was coming from inside his mouth! I held out my hand and into it he dropped a tiny, baby sparrow that had fallen from its nest in the eves of our porch. There was not a mark on it.
From the beginning Cody was truly loving, if a little insecure-he would never stay in a room alone if one of us were somewhere nearby and always wanted to be as close to us as he possibly could.
Our 'thing' has always been camping and Cody settled into our camping life and was soon loved by all our camping friends-to the extent that one friend, Graham, would make two breakfasts on camp, one for him and one for Cody-a slice of bacon and a bowl of tea.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Since we had to let him go over the Rainbow Bridge we have had a non-stop e-mails, phone calls, texts and messages-little Cody loved everyone and touched so many lives in his own short life and was loved by so many in return.

He has been gone from us for just over two days now and the hurt and loss and grief had not diminished in any way.
We both start and end the day in tears and tears fill odd gaps during the day and night, with any little thing setting us off and the small moments we had with him at the end have become such treasured memories

~playing with his Christmas toys and collecting the post
~our last snowy walks together
~his last moments in our snowy garden ~ he was standing and wagging his tail in the hope of another walk
~a cuddle with dad on the sofa
~on his last drive to the vet, sitting on the back seat he turned his head and rested his nose against my mouth, giving me what we always called a 'seal kiss'
~his little face and tail still wagging as we left him, giving him a tickle under his chin-his eyes were bright and he looked as if he were saying 'hurry back soon to take me home'
~on our return to the vets, although he was sedated, he was alert enough to know that we were there with him, his eyes moving from each of us constantly


***It is a comfort to know that during his last moments he was comfortable and at peace and he fell asleep with us holding him close and telling him how very much we loved him***

~***~

No matter how many years will pass Cody will forever be in our hearts and souls and we know his little spirit will be with us, wherever we may be~his eyes bright and his tail wagging, waiting for our next adventure.

Sleep well our beautiful boy
We love you Cody

~can you see~

~cody plays with his new toys*2nd january~

i took this photo and it was not until sunday night swampy noticed something unusual in this picture~please look closely and tell me what you can see...

~sleep well~

~sleep well my beautiful boy~



Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

~photos~

our good friend Al had posted some lovely photos of cody on his blog

~cody~

cody came to us five years and a week ago today

today we had to let him go onto the otherworld without us

xoxoxox

~spiral~

over the last few months i have not been...right

not myself

not on the outside

nor even just below the surface

but deep inside of me

spiraling

sometimes i feel as if i am back to being a teenager, being told what to do, it feels like me is being slowly stripped away until there is nothing left but a husk of me, a husk that obeys and keeps quiet to keep peace

i have slowly become more tearful~sometimes for no reason other than because i feel so awfully, dreadfully fed up~i sit here now holding back the tears

there are times when i can no longer force myself to smile, even if its a pretend smile, i just want to sit and not be
or the easier thing of going to bed to sleep so everything goes away and i can lose myself in dreams-bed time is a relief of laying in the dark with my radio

some mornings i wish i could just continue sleeping so i didnt have to think

its hard seeing people, although luckily i dont see many, and having to slip into my happy personality~i just want to be

i no longer feel i have the energy to spare on being the pretend me

~thanks for the shot NASA~

satellite image of snow over the UK-NASA/GSFC, MODIS Rapid Response

this is a current image of the uk from nasa~and many places are as cold as the south pole.

if you run a finger up from the G in GSFC i live just inland from when you hit land and to the right you will see a huge swirl of cloud coming in, a cloud full of snow that will bring snow to the whole of england and wales, at first a flurries today and tomorrow then persistant and heavy by sunday...at least that is what they are saying and this prediction has not changed in over 24 hours. in fact it is belived this weather will be with us for at least ten days more...
reports are saying that councils are having to be sparing with the salt/grit they spread on the major roads as supplies are tunning low and there is an element of panic buying in the shops.

the last major snow here in this ancient forest was a good thrity years ago, maybe more, when to get into the village my mum had to sit my little sister on the sledge my dad had built because the snow was too deep for her to walk and there was no traffic coming in or going out of the village.

every year many people here wish for a white christmas at the very least and we are not a country geared up for this kind of weather-we do not keep snow chains in our cars or snow shovels in our sheds and so you can imagine the chaos this is causing.

today we were supposed to wake to cold, blue skies~in fact as it has become lighter and lighter the sky is in fact a blanket of pale grey, the kind of pale grey that holds snow~so today we are bringing our snowboard bags down from the attic and taking out our snowboard boots for any walks in the village.

*~stay safe and warm wherever you are~*

~it had to happen...~

sooner or later it had to happen

i couldn't hold out any longer

i just had to have one...


blackberry joy...

like birkenstock joy but more technological

no more stupid typo's thanks to qwerty

an organiser so i no longer have to rely on a calender, mobile and filofax to keep everything in order...woe my poor memory!

i admit it, i love my blackberry

~a snowy*icy village~

after seeing this mornings weather forecast for the south over the coming few days we decided to make our way into the village for supplies, just in case deliverys could not be made~the snow we had has frozen solid and so it was a very slow and slippy, slidy walk.

no gritting lorries come through here so the road was solid ice

cody is feeling much better~although his tummy is swollen due to being given three high doses of anti-biotics in such a short space of time~pro-biotic, natural yogurt is the oder of the day to settle his internal flora and fauna!

we have been watching the weather forecasts closely and here in the south we are due snow flurries tomorrow and saturday...sunday however shows a huge black, snow filled cloud sitting right above us...so watch this space!

~back to normal?~

i would say yes we are~here in the ancient place that is nova foresta we are slowly slipping into our usual routines

cody flew through his post-op check up with flying colors~only coming away with five days pain killers as the patch he has was obviously not doing what it should...but he is so much happier and in comfort now, its a joy to see after we were so close to loosing him.

today we took down our tree and assorted decorations around the forever home, but we did leave some white fairy lights up for the time being~a set draped across the top of our bookcase and another set over our mantel place/alter.
i have also left the wreath on our front door~taking off the yule decorations and i plan to have it as a piece of on-going work throughout the year to celebrate the festivals.

now things have settled i have been reading the two books i was given~

both are very enjoyable and its a joy to snuggle up in bed at night and read away until my eyes start closing~then i turn off the lamp and drift off to sleep listening to radio 4 (waking up just enough to turn the radio off an hour or two later!)

i love radio 4~for those of you who do not know, it is a non-music channel~news, arts, comedy, history, drama, politics...i have found that the older i get, the more i dislike listening to music i dislike in the hope i get to hear a single song or two that i do like~and given most of the music i listen to is way off the main stream, i find it a safer option to avoid music channels...although i have to say their 'religion and ethics' contributions are rather one sided to say the least...i tend to switch to classic fm come sunday.

maybe i am just getting old for i find all the 'shoutyness' of radio 1 and 2 irksome.

i celebrated the new year in my usual way~by not celebrating for my new year is the solstice~instead i was in bed by 8.30, i was feeling weary and tired and cody was in some discomfort and so i made him as comfortable as possible on the bed with me while i read.
when i turned off the lamp he stayed curled up beside me so i spent some time resting my hand on him and projecting my healing/protecting light onto him.

~**************************************************~

the setting blue moon~new years day

it was shining straight in the front room windows...

~my boy is home~

we were able to collect cody from the vets yesterday and it feels so good to have him here.
he is doing everything he should~eating chicken and rice, little and often, drinking, pooping etc but is in a lot of discomfort from his stitches, although he has a pain-killer patch on his side. so we didn't get too much sleep last night.

the vet was lovely and explained everything to us (even providing the offending conker in a little pot!)...the bill however was not, on top of the £114 we paid on christmas day we had a further £678 to pay...help!!!
luckily we were able to pay £300 and they are letting us pay the rest in a few chunks...no we have no pet insurance although you can be sure will will from now!

does anyone have that kind of cash hanging around at this time of year?

please don't answer if you are a millionaire!


the important thing he is home!